“I got a new life, you would hardly recognize me”

The last post was a bit heavy. Something lighter for a Friday. Blouse by Zara. I should buy stock, their clothes males up half my closet these days. Lipstick by Urban Decay. Giving red lips a try, and back to a darker shade of blonde. 

And

Have a wonderful weekend. In museum and antique shopping  mode here.with my ride or die (as the kids say) And that’s the tea, sis. Haha! Will also be working on my latest poetry book. It should be out this summer. I would like to donor any profits made to the National Center fot Missing and Exploited Children. 

And now a song of the day.

“I saw the sign and it opened up my eyes, I saw the sign/  Life is demanding without understanding/ I saw the sign and it opened up my eyes, I saw the sign/  No one’s gonna drag you up to get into the light where you belong.”

Me. You. We. 

Thought for the day, a long one.

Individualism can be a positive thing. It’s wonderful to be self-reliant, independent, and focused on personal growth. However, it becomes less appealing when it turns into self-absorption. One of the reasons why I took a step back from social media a good while ago is because I found myself becoming too self-involved and too consumed with being liked online. It’s such an easy trap to fall in to. “Look at meeee”. “Notice me!” In the end, it’s exhausting and takes away from things that are truly important.

Of course, one of the ways we express our individualism is through the Internet. This isn’t necessarily a bad thing. The danger comes when it leads to self-absorption. Let’s face it, narcissism is an epidemic and social media is the root of its contagion. There’s this desire to be seen and admired. But what does it really get us? Does it improve our well-being? Life in my opinion, should not be defined by how popular we are online. Life should be defined by how we live and treat others. It’s also not so much about what we leave behind. How many times do we say, I want to leave a legacy behind? But what kind of legacy, one that’s all about us and our achievements or one that betters humanity?

One day we’re all going to turn to dust. What matters is the now. In the end, it’s not who we knew, or what we did. It’s how we lived that matters. We can write the greatest masterpiece or paint a scene that even Monet would envy but if we live a selfish, me-centered life we’re still going to be remembered as really cruddy human beings.

There’s just so much superficial bs on the internet. Just look at Instagram and all the so-called models. Okay, we get it; you’re handsome and, yes, you’re very pretty, but what else you got? What’s your soul made of? What are your thoughts on poverty and global warming? When was the last time you helped someone who was hurting? Better question, when the last time you thought of someone other than yourself?

Another scary thing about individualism aside from a self-centered mentality is that it can be isolating and a great deterrent to empathy. We are all over here living in our own little bubbles, meanwhile people are suffering, being abused or living in abject poverty. Empathy is so important. We have to be able to see things from other’s perspectives. We can’t do that if we’re constantly worrying about ourselves and our viewpoints. One just has to look at the current political climate to see what I’m talking about.

Okay, to be fair, social media isn’t the only culprit in this self-absorbed, individualistic trend. It also has a lot to do with our culture. The roots of our country are founded on independence. We also live in a wealthy nation, and that affluence can breed detachment. The more self-reliant we become, the less we depend on others. One would have to surmise that eventually this could lead to greater economic disparity. “Well as long as I’m not struggling.” However, if we don’t care about the less fortunate, who will?

I don’t know what the solution is. Maybe if we can find a balance between individualism and collectivism. In the latter, there’s a greater emphasis on others, people work together to promote change. Family and community are everything. I know for myself, I’m much happier when I get out of my head and think of humanity. My love ones are everything to me. My greatest joy is spending time with them. Of course, it’s okay to care about ourselves. We should be proud of our accomplishments and want to be liked. We should constantly be working on becoming a better human. I don’t begrudge anyone success and self-confidence, just not at the expense of others.

Let me close on a positive note. Those of us who live in the Western world have been blessed with much: civil liberties, the rule of law, democratic processes. Very few of us need to worry about being tortured or falsely arrested. We are blessed in many ways. Social media has it merits too. It can foster a lot of good. WP is an example of that. It’s lovely to see people sharing their creativity and supporting others. Social activism many times starts online. It can be a wonderful tool for rallying the proverbial troops. Facebook and its kind can be a platform for those who are lonely or shut in to connect with people globally. There’s a lot of goodness online and off. I’ve seen it in my daily life and in all of you.

Umm…just make sure you like and comment on all my posts, follow me on all my social media accounts, buy my latest book when it comes out, and notice my back to back to back workouts selfies on Insta. Baby got it going on, yo!

Sarcasm y’all.
Sarcasm. ❤️

-Tosha Michelle 

Monday Motivation 

Hello there fellow WP peeps. Happy Monday. I give you a song and some visual inspiration to start your wrek. Definitely want to do a cover of this beautiful tune. Listen below. I love these lyrics and song so much. It’s called “Higher I Will Go” Hope you like it as much as I do. 

“It’s gonna take some time to get there
/ And you gotta fight for what you love  /Gotta keep on pushing forward /Showing the world what you’re made of.

But there is a song, rising from the ashes /And there is a hope, that’s bigger than my fears /There is a love, stronger than my failures :And it’s callin’ me higher  

So Higher I Will Go”

And now for some Monday silliness and inspiration. 

Time 


They say time will tell,
but does it?

Why then
are we always asking?

It doesn’t even have a face,
just two hands that only
meet twice a day.

Why do we focus so
much on its passing?

We can’t change it.
Yet, we still seek answers.
Constantly questioning
leading to more of it lost.

We forget that time and
all its duplicity belongs
to us.

Time matters?
Only if wasted.

-Tosha Michelle

Valentines, Cupid, Judge Judy, and A Poem.

Oh and flowers, candy, kittens, and the newest Kindle. Reading is fundamental. 😍Happy Valentine’s Day, beautiful ones. Don’t you roll your eyes at me! 😜  Whether you’re single or in a committed relationship, today can be a wonderful time not only to celebrate the love of your life, but also the love IN your life. Love is beautiful in all its forms. You might also want to remember how truly special you are. Shoot yourself with a bow of self love, not literally of course. “But your honor, she told me too” 😙

Before this turns into Judge Judy, here’s a new poem of mine. But first Tucker has a message for you all.​

​Wishing you all the love that you can handle, and chocolate too.❤️


Sometimes love finds us
where there’s history,
in a tapestry that refuses
to be worn away.
Proving that nothing truly
loved is forgotten.
Here you can rest for days
and leave the map.
The sullen iciness of days
misspent, replaced by the
warmth of the sun’s gaze.
Hearts touched by the
grace of transparency.
Standing on soulful, solid
ground, grateful for the earth,
and the tenderness it returns.
Knowing nothing is endless,
all beginnings end, but
solace is found in each moment,
loved and loving.

-Tosha Michelle

Eyes Wide Open 

My eye has almost healed. Yay! Still a little red but looking  straighter. The final alignment takes a few months. Will update with another photo then. 


 Enough of me and my eye journey. I did want to share because this is huge for me, especially since it improved my vision a bit.  Now here’s some music to get our Sunday off to a tuneful start  Lots of love❤️  -Tosha 

Life’s Afternoons

Life’s afternoons pass quickly
The buzz. The bark. The lilies.
Take notices of these things.
Eat the pear. Find meaning in the sea, the clouds, the elms.
Listen to the song of the birds,
the solitaires, the chamber music of the air.
Know sometimes the sky will
darken, but eventually the overcast grey will lighten.

Take the long way home.
Crown yourself with constellations.
Lounge under the grand oak.
Don’t be afraid to walk toward
the cliff’s edge.
If you fall. Find the lesson in
a halo broken.

Bend close to the curves of ears of those you love, tell them how much you care. If words dissolve on your tongue,
give them the warmth of your arms instead.

Believe in the call notes of
your heart. Store up the
soul’s rubies and sapphires.
Drink up all the moonlight
you can.
Be more than just a stray wind.
While you’re alive, live
have faith in the possibilities,
the thorns, the rosehip, and
the ever changing pitch of
afternoons well spent.

-Tosha Michelle

The History of Love 


Quotes from one of my favorite books. If you’re a romantic like me “The History of Love” by Nicole Kraus will not disappoint. Thie novel has become a modern day classic and is loved all over the world. it’s just such a poignant, heart stirring read. Every chapter is  a true work of art and a testament to the enduring power of love. The writing is lyrical and stunning. Once I have fully recovered from eye surgery perhaps, I will write a full review of the novel. It’s one of those life changing books to be sure.  

Synopsis

A long-lost book reappears, mysteriously connecting an old man searching for his son and a girl seeking a cure for her widowed mother’s loneliness.

Leo Gursky taps his radiator each evening to let his upstairs neighbor know he’s still alive. But it wasn’t always like this: in the Polish village of his youth, he fell in love and wrote a book…Sixty years later and half a world away, fourteen-year-old Alma, who was named after a character in that book, undertakes an adventure to find her namesake and save her family. With virtuosic skill and soaring imaginative power, Nicole Krauss gradually draws these stories together toward a climax of “extraordinary depth and beauty” ( Newsday).

A few of my favorite quotes from the book

“That’s what I do. Watch movies and read. Sometimes I even pretend to write, but I’m not fooling anyone. Oh, and I go to the mailbox.”

“Once upon a time there was a boy who loved a girl, and her laughter was a question he wanted to spend his whole life answering.”

“Even now, all possible feelings do not yet exist, there are still those that lie beyond our capacity and our imagination. From time to time, when a piece of music no one has ever written or a painting no one has ever painted, or something else impossible to predict, fathom or yet describe takes place, a new feeling enters the world. And then, for the millionth time in the history of feeling, the heart surges and absorbs the impact.”

“For her I changed pebbles into diamonds, shoes into mirrors, I changed glass into water, I gave her wings and pulled birds from her ears and in her pockets she found the feathers, I asked a pear to become a pineapple, a pineapple to become a lightbulb, a lightbulb to become the moon, and the moon to become a coin I flipped for her love”

“She learned back and looked at him with something like hurt, and then he almost but didn’t say the two sentences he’d been meaning to say for years: Part of me is made of glass, and also, I love you.”

“At the end, all that’s left of you are your possessions. Perhaps that’s why I’ve never been able to throw anything away. Perhaps that’s why I hoarded the world: with the hope that when I died, the sum total of my things would suggest a life larger than the one I lived.”

“So many words get lost. They leave the mouth and lose their courage, wandering aimlessly until they are swept into the gutter like dead leaves. On rainy days you can hear their chorus rushing past.”

Tune of the day. I’d change it to Carolina dreaming of course. 💕

“Lucy, you got some ‘splainin’ to do!” 


Beautiful, fiery, bold, and funny, Lucille Ball was one of America’s most beloved comedians, best known for her self-produced television show ‘I Love Lucy’.The show’s success was phenomenal. It’s impact om American television legendary. Ball co-starred with her husband the dashing Desi Arnaz, who played the iconic Ricky Ricardo. Desi was also a pioneer in broadcasting. He was the genius behind what would become modern sitcom format and those lovely little things called reruns that made “I Love Lucy” known to my generation and beyond. 


 Desi and Lucy’s rocky love story is one for the ages. He once said they “loved and fought furiously” They had a tumultuous 20-year marriage. And even after they split, the pair remained in each other’s lives until Desi’s death in 1986. Despite their breakup, they still loved each other. They truly are my favorite celebrity couple. There’s a new movie coming out about them starring Cate Blanchett as Lucille Ball. Oscar- and Emmy-winner Aaron Sorkin is writing the script.  Looking forward to seeing it.  Right before Desi passed, he wrote this about Lucy and the show.

“Lucy was the show. Viv, Fred and I were just props. Damn good props, but props nevertheless. P.S. ​I Love Lucy was never just the title.” Awwww.

Some of my favorite lines from…

Ricky Ricardo: Lucy’s acting crazy!

Fred Mertz: Crazy for Lucy or crazy for ordinary people?
—————
Ricky Ricardo: What do you want me to do, starve to death?

Lucy Ricardo: Would you, please?
—————
Lucy Ricardo: There’s just two things keeping me from dancing in that show.

Fred Mertz: Your feet?
————-
Lucy Ricardo: Y’know, I’ve been thinking about shows like Burns and Allen. George Burns uses his wife on the show. Why don’t you?

Ricky Ricardo: I’d love to! Do you think she would leave George?

————
And now a few of my favorite quotes from
the Queen of Comedy herself.


It’s a helluva start, being able to recognize what makes you happy.

One of the things I learned the hard way was that it doesn’t pay to get discouraged. Keeping busy and making optimism a way of life can restore your faith in yourself.

I’m happy that I have brought laughter because I have been shown by many the value of it in so many lives, in so many ways.

Finally, the genius that was “I Love Lucy”

Going Ons

Indeed…

Feeling blousey

This and that.

1. My eye corection surgery is scheduled for next Tuesday. Excited but not looking forward to being put to sleep. Wish me luck. The recovery time is pretty short. Glad for that. The surgery will correct the alignment of my left eye and hopefully, improve my peripheral vision. I have full confidence in my doctor. His name is Benjamin Krammer.. I highly recommend him.

2. When I originally started my blog, it was a place to write about life’s little oddities, post book reviews and ny random musings. Recently, I think it has reverted back to that concept with poetry thrown into the mix. The blog at one point had metamorphosis into strictly a poetry spot. There was a time when I wrote constantly. I was going through a tough time and writing was my therapy.

Nowadays, life is more stable and I’m in a healthier state of mind . It’s also a much busier time. I find myself writing less, but the muse is still there. It’s just learning to write from a place of stability . I suppose I could hone in on unresolved hurt feelings, and painful events, but I choose not too. I choose to focus on the positive and all the blessings in my world. 

Everything that has happened to me has placed me where I am suppose to be. I’ve always tried to put love out there, and I feel like karma is acknowledging that. Things are finally going really well after a few years of chaos.. I’m grateful for what was and the growth it has brought me. No regrets. I’m stronger and better for it all. I’m also aware, given how anxious and sentimental I can be that there will still be times of angst and disquieting moments. That is the human condition when one feels things on a deeply emotional level. However, I’m more equipped to handle those setbacks now. I’m living for what is. Turns out what is is pretty lovely.  

3. I also find myself spending much less time on social media. It’s odd given that I used to be such an enthusiast. I really enjoyed posting and connecting with new people. These days I’m just happy to connect with those who already know and love me. Most of my online time is devoted to criminal justice pursuits, as well as less noble causes like Amazon browsing and watching various Youtubers. 

4. We will be traveling to the Outer Banks in April . For those of you who have been, any suggestions on must see attractions? I’m hoping to see some wild horses running along the beach. 

5. Lastly, thanks so much for sticking with me through my many moods and blog stages. WordPress definitely attracts creative and  kind people. I’m happy to interact with you all.

-Tosha

PS. For those of you who are strictly here for the poetry, my friend Misty and I will be releasing a poetry book later this year.
Details coming soon. 💕

PPS. I watched a documentary on Netflix last night called  Tricky Dick and the Man in Black. It chronicled the relationship between Johnny Cash and Richard Nixon. Johnny showed Nixon that he was nobody’s fool. The documentary put me in a Cash state of mind. His cover of “Hurt” gets me every time.