I tend to be either deeply philosophical or deeply silly. I’ll let you decide where my mood falls tonight.
Dear Men,
I know you live for my letters. The tips that just keep on giving. In that vein, I present my latest top ten list. Take notes.
1. We women like to be taken but not in a way that requires our fathers to bring out their particular set of skills. You know the ones they have acquired over their long career. No, we want be taken up against the wall, on the kitchen counter, on your desk, etc. We love to feel wanted and desirable.
2. Pet names can be very sweet. However, don’t make them too cutesy. There’s nothing sexy about being called Kissy Kibbles, Schnookums or Licky Sticky Poo.
3. It is never appropriate to call us a bit** or by your ex-girlfriend’s name.
4.You don’t fake foreplay. We won’t fake an orgasm.
5. Ladies first. See number 4.
6. There’s something extremely sexy about a man who can recite Shakespeare while listening to Bach as he fixes a leaky pipe.
7. Be romantic. Note, sometimes being romantic simply means doing the laundry.
8. Listen to us, dam*it
9. You’re adorable when you are shaving, driving, being kind to your mother, holding a baby. etc.
10. Love us. Respect us. Protect us. Do us.
Everything I Never Told You 