Sage Wisdom (cough. cough) by Yours Truly

1. On the days you can’t seem to please anyone, please yourself.

2. Everyone has baggage. It’s just that some of ours comes in a carry on while others comes in a tank of a suitcase.

3. You can never change a man so don’t even try. Love him as he is and save your energy for more important endeavors: like eating Godiva, shopping, and hiding his body.

4. Justice may be for all, but seldom is.

5. Childbirth is a walk in the park compared to child rearing.

6. Less fear. More action.

7. Music can soothe the soul unless it is hip hop; then I just want to brain someone.

8. When in Hot Topic, be sure to distinguish between the door and glass window before charging toward what you think is the exit. Trust me, your head will thank you. Also, take along a friend and children who will actaully stop you from the aforementioned instead of laughing at you like you are the funniest thing since Bridesmaids, the movie. OK, never mind that film was terrible, but you get the point.

9. Unsolicited advice is rarely appreciated unless the person you are giving it to is hammered at the time.

10. Wearing freakishly high heels to a standing room only concert is never a good idea; just ask my feet.

11.. Kindness is more important than having the last word unless, you are dealing with a jerk; then go ahead get in the last dig:)

12. Money does not buy happiness, but it can buy a boatload of chocolate.

13. Love, not time, heals all wounds.

14. Bitterness and resentment will destroy your soul. Let it go!

15. I can’t help how I feel, but I can help how I act on my feelings.

16. Accept and value yourself. This will bring you happiness. Embrace the good and the bad. I think we will always care what others think of us. But the key it to stop worrying about it and live our lives on our terms. Love the ones who matter. Leave out the rest.

17. It’s not what you say, it is what you do. So carry a big stick. I know Huh???

18. No matter how much you care, some people are just A-holes.

19. If you are a celebrity, sadly, you can get away with pretty much anything.

20. Southern girls do it better. Note, I am not sure what “it” is, but trust me, we do it better!

21. Sweet tea goes with anything.

22. Cats only want attention when you are sleeping, reading, writing a paper, or doing chores.

23. By the way, my cat is a rock star.

24. Reading is fundamental, but math will get you the high paying jobs.

25. There is beauty in imperfection.

26. Growth only comes through change; or eating tons of chocolate.

27. Everyday you should reach out and touch someone, just be prepared to be slapped.

28. It is more important to be lovable than loved.

29. In order to get along with your obnoxious, elitist, know it all of an neighbor, pretend they’re someone else’s.

30. Robert Frost was right, “Life goes on.”

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It’s OK if in 2014…

Your New Year’s resolution doesn’t get any deeper than conditioner . …If Pier One Imports is your happy place. ..to secretly crave Godiva chocolate, horde Godiva chocolates and hide Godiva chocolates from your family’s grubby little hands (They’re mine I tell you. MINE) …if you read Fifty Shades of Grey and liked it. (I mean I didn’t of course, but if you did it’s OK..No shame. ;)) …If you secretly long to be a warrior princess but are more of a nerdy chick who gets lost in her own head and parking lots …to be a little freaked out by escalators. (Escalaphobia is real, people. Down with judgment …up with awareness.. down with misconceptions…up with facts…is anyone else dizzy?) …It’s also OK to love without conditions …to dream without limitations … to hope without expectations and to live without fear.

(It’s not OK to shorten words into monosyllables…I mean that’s  just cray, bae..kay?)

10 Compliments We Women Never Tire of Hearing

 

10 Compliments We Women Never Tire of Hearing

1.   I love your Jimmy Choo shoes.

(Payless actually, but thanks.)

2.   You’ve lost weight.

(My winter clothes work wonders.)

3.   You’re a culinary master.

(I call my technique take out.)

4.   You’re a natural beauty.

(Thanks. It took me an hour to perfect this look.)

5.   Are you a dancer?

(My best move is tripping up the stairs.)

6.   I could listen to you talk for hours.

(Good, because I have a litany of items to discuss.)

7.   You’re so witty.

(Ugh, the pressure!)

8.   You look so Italian?

(Grazie mille!)

9.   Your mind is a thing of beauty.

(It is, isn’t it?)

10.               You were right.

(Told you so)

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Dear Santa, I can explain everything.

Oops, wait, you guys weren’t meant to see that.:)  I do hope you will take moment to read what follows.

Christmas, either the lightest of light or, heaviest of dark..for all those with weeping souls and wounded spirits..my heart is with you.

May the spirit of Christmas find us.

Let it be a balm of comfort and peace,

a vessel for love and giving,.

a beacon of hope and renewal.

May it reside in our hearts eternally.

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 Merry Christmas!

Not Just a Girl.

 
Inside she is sunshine.

An innocent girl.

Full of dreams.

Her whole life ahead of her.

The world at her feet.

Out on the street

In the late summer heat.

Men with wicked schemes.

She meets

They have her in their reach.

Sadness and horror they teach.

Selling her to the highest bidder.

Money they will keep.

Binding her in chains.

A sex slave they seek.

Breaking her spirit.

Crushing her soul.

Taking her humanity.

All for gold.

Inside she is broken.

A heart that just a shell.

Her body void and empty.

Her life a living hell.

The terror gets worse.

Fear it grows.

Brutality all she knows

Can anyone hear her?

 
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She is only 12 years old

 

 

Join in the fight against Modern Day Slavery. You can make a difference.  
 

Ode to My Cat.

The silliest of silliest..

Not Quite-The Cat in The Hat….

My cat can rock, My cat can roll.

He knows how to keep with the beat.

Dancing around in the streets.

My cat can recite Shakespeare with ease

You see, he’s fluent in  CATionese

My cat is king of all he surveys.

Mostly, he’s surveys his food bowl.

My cat  is an expert at snoozing.

Who knows.. perhaps,  he’s been boozing.

My cat is the greatest of muses.

Poets and writers he inspires.

My cat is cool…the coolest of the cool.

He’ll snort his nip. And not give a …sh…..amen

My cat is a saint and a sinner.

His whole world revolves around dinner.

My cat is a superior

Just look at his posterior.

My cat is the greatest.

And now it been stated.

My cat will never be overrated.

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This nonsense brought to you by-Crazy Cats Ladies Everywhere and Yours Truly.

Happy Holidays!! May your turkeys and stockings be stuffed. The love and wine ever flowing. and may Santa find you being naughty and nice. xo